Update on Beach gathering September 12th

OK Everyone! Just wanted to post an update on the Bech party I posted before. I originally said "South Mission", but after some very sagely advise from someone who knows a lot more than I (Higgy-baby!), we are looking at Mission Beach, just South of the Roller Coaster. There is a grassy area and BBQ available, and of course, the fire pits! So, if you are interested, please show up! I will give more details in days to come.

Thanks everyone!!! :)

Beach Bon-fire planned at South Mission on the 12th of September!

I posted something about this on Facebook (late June/Early July) about trying to organize a Bon-Fire at South Mission before the end of the summer before my Dad took ill. Well, it is time to start planning on this again. In fact, after my Dad’s funeral talking to Jesse, Lee, Joel, Dan and Deb and Kevin the whole “wouldn’t it be good if we got together on the beach…?” conversation came up! So, in getting with the above mentioned folks it seems that a good day will be Saturday, September 12th, 2009 for a gathering of folks from Kearny/Taft and any invitees at South Mission. Are you from Mission Village? Serra Mesa? You should be there! :)

We will try and get a Fire ring so we can have a fire into the evening. (We may need some wood to be brought!) Bring your own food and drink (I understand Mission has banned alcohol…?) and let’s have some fun!

Time: ? TBD (More info to come, but I know some cannot make it until after 4 pm. My son and I will want to be there earlier in the day though to exhibit our Boogie-boarding prowess! :)

Let me know if you have any questions. If you need my email address, let me know. (I don’t publish it publicly on here…) More details to come!

The Funeral on Saturday August 1st was very nice.

We had about 30 people attend and the event turned out as good as I could have hoped. I don’t know how you can say that a funeral is “good” (if that makes sense) but the event went very well. I was afraid that I might mess up doing the eulogy. I felt like I stumbled through, but got assurances afterward that things went OK. My brother and I were very happy with the turn out, and everyone was so kind. We had family and friends show up and give a tremendous amount of support. I arrived close to an hour early and we already had people there!
My brother, my family and I would like to thank all those who came out and showed their support and offered their condolences. It is so great to feel everyone’s support!

Something else that happened on Saturday the 1st- after the service my wife, my brother and I were going to get some lunch. Brenda chose the perfect place to eat…The Little Fish Market in Mission Valley. Why was that perfect? The last time my family gathered together to be wit my dad we went to the Little Fish Market and got some take out and went down to Mission Bay and had a little lunch overlooking the water. Well, when we showed up at the Little Fish Market, it was closed! They were taking the signs down from the walls! At first we were bummed…but then we thought how fitting it was that my dad’s favorite place to eat was closing down. (And not sure why it closed…there was always a lot of people there when we went in!).

Finally, for dinner that night we couldn’t decide where to go. My son made the suggestion to go to El Indio Taco shop downtown. That was a perfect place for us, and it has become my son’s favorite eatery in San Diego. I remember it from many years ago when I worked at the Union 76 station that used to be down the street…

All in all, this was a very good weekend as we gathered together to remember my dad, spend time with wonderful friends and family, and take in the beauty of San Diego.

Memorial Weekend- The scattering of ashes

On July 31st, 2009 we held a ceremony to scatter my dad’s ashes at sea. Well, maybe “ceremony” is too formal a word…what we did was celebrate my dad’s love of the ocean by taking his ashes off shore to a place we felt was significant for him and scattered his ashes while telling stories of my dad’s fishing trips and anecdotes of times spent on or near the ocean. One of the truly tremendous things for me was so sit on this boat and spend the time with my only son, who enjoyed the time on the water and found out how wonderful time at sea can be and came to understand why “Grandpa” would love it so much.
The ceremony was simple- just a prayer and a thank you for a dad who worked hard and spent time with us doing things like fishing. My brother and I scattered the ashes, then we all tossed flowers into the ocean around the spot.
A special Thank You goes to Eric Meins for taking us out on his boat and providing the flowers we scattered with the ashes. He was a tremendous help to us and a blessing at this most difficult time…
Due to limited space, we only had 6 people on the boat: Eric the captain of the boat, myself, my brother Dave, my wife Brenda, my son Daniel, and our long time friend Carmen, whose mom was friends with my mom and whose brother played baseball with me for years.
It was a terrific time and I cannot express how wonderful it was. We even had a pod of porpoises swim in front of the boat on the way back in from the scattering! It was awesome!

Service Time for my dad is 10:30 am, August 1st

The info is below on where it will be held, and the obituary should be in the Union/Trib. starting Wednesday or Thursday. Due to very limited space on the boat, the scattering at sea to be held on Friday will be a private ceremony.
Once again, thank you to all of you who have email, called, posted comments, or sent cards. I really appreciate everything and it is great to know my dad was appreciated, and that our family is supported so much!
Neptune Society Chapel14065 Hwy 8 Business
El Cajon, CA 92021
(619-561-6400)

My dad passed away on July 18th...

Some background:He was diagnosed with esophageal cancer (Squamous cell carcinoma) late in June and had a series of complications from that point forward. He struggled with Hypercalcemia (an increase of the calcium in his blood), which led to dehydration, impacting his concentration and cognitive capabilities. The tumor itself apparently contributed to furthering the Hypercalcemia by generating more calcium on its own. Between July 3rd and the 16th he went from being admitted into Sharp Memorial in San Diego a couple of times to being in a nursing facility and then being readmitted to Sharps on the 16th. His health quickly declined over the last couple of days with a notification late on the 16th of my dad having kidney problems. Early on the 17th we were told his kidneys were shutting down. Dave (my brother) called me at work and I left for San Diego. Yesterday morning my brother and I met with the Dr. and the condition was stated pretty clearly- at 80 years old his body was shutting down and it was time to prepare for the inevitable. We stayed with him throughout the day and at 9:48 pm my dad’s heart stopped. At 10:08 pm the Dr. officially announced the time of death.

Some acknowledgements:My brother David has done so much for my dad over the years, but in the last month he has gone from work to the hospital, then back to work and spent so much of his time and energy helping my dad, checking on him and taking care of him. I really appreciate all that he has done for our dad. The nursing staff and Dr.’s at Sharp Memorial were fantastic. They took a vested interest in our dad, were very kind to us and were compassionate to the end. They really were wonderful and could not have taken better care of him.

Alltime Padre tribute...and Father's Day? Actually it makes sense.

What is your favorite Padre moment of all time? Was it when Dave Winfield was elected to the HOF? The Padres first World Series game? Enzo Hernandez establishing the National League mark for most Sacrifice Bunts in a season...? :)

For me, my favorite Padre moment ties into Father's Day weekend. Mine was watching the Padres win all three playoff games against the Cubs in San Diego in 1984 with my Dad. My Dad's legs were not too strong, but we made it to the upper deck to watch all three games. And more specifically, the greatest moment of those games was Steve Garvey's homer against Lee Smith in game 4. The moment when the Flannery ground ball went through Leon Durham's legs in game 5 was awesome (Teddy bears began raining down from the upper deck!), but Garvey's homer still gives me goose bumps to this day. And although I love Jerry Coleman, I still hear Don Drysdale's call in my head (since from my angle I thought Henry Cotto had a chance to catch it), "Deep right field, way back! Cotto going back to the wall...it's gone!!! Home run Garvey, and there will be tomorrow!" (Don Drysdale on ABC-TV). And I saw it all with my dad... :)

MY selection for the All Time SD Padres team

I have recently posted a poll on my Facebook page asking the good folks on Facebook to select their favorite All Time Padre team as a way to celebrate the San Diego Padres' 40th Anniversary. Here I am posting my selection for the All Time Padres' team. My criteria is for performance and stats while the players are with the Padres. Why is that significant? Well, Ricky Henderson played for a few years near the end of his career with the Padres. But he is not my All Time Padre left fielder, since Gene Richards did more for the Padres throughout his career. Ricky Henderson had a FAR better MLB career, but while with the Padres, Gene Richards made more of an impact. (Make sense?) Anyway...above is my choice for the ALL TIME Padre team, and why I voted for each player.

Dad is out of the Hospital

I got a call from my brother around 3:30 pm today to tell me my dad was released from the hospital. He is home and enjoying being out of the Hospital. I called him on the way home and he sounded so glad to be out. He asked me to thank all those that sent their best wishes for him and prayers. He was truly glad to hear about people being concerned about him and asked me to tell everyone that he "has flown the cupe" and is home!
Thank you everyone for your support, and once again, thanks to my brother for taking care of him and seeing him almost every day while he was in the hospital.

The latest on my Dad...

There seems to be a disconnect in the communication with my Dad and his release! Argh! I spoke with my brother this afternoon and it seems as though the communication gap between the Dr. and the staff, etc has been cleared up. He has been assigned a discharge nurse, which is a great sign that they will now release him tomorrow (Thursday). That would be great, and he seems to really be feeling better.
My brother has been a wealth of support to my dad, and has definitely done all he can to keep me informed...so a big THANK YOU to him for taking care of so many things.

Update on my dad

I spoke with my Dad last night and he said he is feeling much better and expects to be released today. There was talk that he would be released days ago, but they were still monitoring his fluid drainage and they feel pretty confident that he will be ok to release possibly today. I have asked my brother (through talking to my dad) to call me with a disposition today...More to come, but things are looking good.

Happy Birthday Le Kait!

Due to the circumstances with my Dad over the weekend I missed a very important day...the Birthday celebration of the wonderfully original and always entertaining Kaitlin! So, a little late, but an "homage" to Kaitlin...(I trust Eric spoiled you...?!?!?)

My dad went into the Hospital a week ago...

last Tuesday. I went to see him over the weekend. He is doing much better, but still will be in the Hospital for a few more days. The issue was a change/increase in his Coumadin dosage which caused internal bleeding and fluid drainage. They took him off the Coumadin and the fluid output has decreased dramatically. But again, he is still going to be in a few more days.

Since the last few days have been long and I am tired, I am going to "cheat" and copy and paste the post that I put onto Facebook on after the weekend (Monday- Memorial Day):
"First I want to thank everyone for your prayers and words of support. Great to have that kind of support. I was going to post something last night, but I was too tired from the drive back (these quick turn-around trips do me in! I am starting to feel a little older... :)On Friday night we had heard that the fluid drainage was not slowing down much. The "fluid" was high in blood content and which was what such a big part of the concern was. The Dr. thinks it was due to his Coumadin dosage increase, basically causing him to bleed internally. So we were pretty concerned. My son and I drove down to San Diego and visited my dad on Saturday afternoon for a few hours until he couldn't stay awake any more. (He stayed awake long enough to see the Padres' win! :) By then, his fluid build up had slowed dramatically. The Dr. had just left right before we got there and he was encouraged by the fluid reduction. This was all good news. We went back and visited him yesterday morning before leaving to come back to PHX and he was doing well. They may release him within a few days. Once again, thank you all for your prayers, and have a great week everyone!"

Video with the "Mom Song" for Mother's day...

In case some of you haven't seen this...
The Mom Song.

Additional Mother's Day thoughts...for Grandma

Yesterday I posted some comments about my mom and the wonderful memories that I had of her. She was truly special and will always live on within my heart and soul as the one who helped to shape me and make something positive out of me. But I would not be who I am and my mother would not be who she was without HER mom...My grandmother.

My Grandma (given name Zeline) was a truly amazing and self sufficient woman. Teased by her brother (my great uncle, who was a great man in his own right) for doing the vacuuming in her pearls alah June Cleaver, my Grandmother was a perfectionist and an amazing woman. I always loved visiting my Grandmother because of her incredible food. She was a great cook. Plus she always had whole milk, where at home all we got was powdered non-fat milk for budget reasons! (Yuk!).

My Grandmother also worked at the famed Hotel del Coronado for 17 years after moving to San Diego from Illinois. She was the head Cashier at the Hotel del during it's landmark conversion from paper reservation systems to one of those new fangled computer systems in the early 80's. The comment from the hotel manager was that my Grandmother's impeccable records were more accurate than any computer ever could be, but they had to "modernize" and "get with the times". Upon retiring from the Hotel she was given a nice plaque with an etching of the famed Hotel and the signatures of her coworkers laser-engraved into the metal. She was loved by the employees as "everyone's Grandma".

But throughout my growing up days I was intimidated by Grandma. She was so perfect- her apartment a few minutes away from the Hotel del Coronado was always clean...spotless...impeccable. She was loving, but she was stern and believed in discipline.

It wasn't until my mother's illness that my Grandmother and I became close. Following my mother's illness my Grandmother would take a series of buses (transferring multiple times along the way) to get from the outskirts of Chula Vista to the nursing home behind Sharp Hospital at least 3 days a week. The trip would take her 1 1/2 to 2 hours each way. She later was able to utilize the trolley and that helped in reducing some of the travel time. But for years and years she kept a constant vigil at my mom's side at least 3 days a week (sometimes 4 and 5 days a week). Through it all, my mom showed no improvement...no change. No sign that things would get any better to give my Grandmother any added incentive to return. She did it to stay by her side, to wipe her brow, to comb her hair, to open my mom's music box or play a music tape to allow my mom to hear some music (and we were not even sure she could hear or understand the music). This dedication and devotion was amazing and taught me what true commitment is. I used to visit my mom too as much as possible. But it was after my mom had been bed-ridden for a few years that I decided to move away from San Diego and take a job elsewhere. It was my Grandmother who kept the vigil and honored my mom and would give me updates on her status via mail and phone call.

My Grandmother later came to live with my family after the passing of my uncle Bill and it was an honor to have her. Unfortunately the ravages of Parkinson's and Alzheimer's were starting to take their toll. But in the end, my Grandmother would show me, even in her final days, so many lessons about life.

So THANK YOU Grandma for all the nice Roasts, and all the slices of pie on sunny afternoons, for the cards and gifts over the years, for treating me with respect and expecting me to act like a man, and most importantly for being committed to your family- to your daughter who you stood by and to your son while he dealt with cancer of his own. You were special and I love you and miss you...

Mom with "us" (Different pics with different people)

My mom with the family over the years...

Mom with my uncle Bill

Pics of my Mom- the younger days...

Here is my Mom when she was younger...

Happy Mother's Day Mom...

Mother's day has been very bitter-sweet for me ever since 1989. It was on May 11th, 1989 (3 days prior to Mother's Day that year if memory serves me correctly) that my mom passed away. Of course, when she passed away it was after spending nearly 8 years in a nursing home due to an aneurysm she suffered on August 18th, 1981 followed by a stroke on August 20th, 1981 which left her in an incapacitated state. Following her death her ashes were scattered and I never got a place to visit in order to remember her. So in this weekend I wanted to honor her and celebrate her life, figuring if there is no memorial marker for her physically, she can be honored in cyberspace.

It is probably no surprise that my mom meant a great deal to me. She took care of my brother and I when my dad was gone (he spent time on a deep-sea drilling ship and then commuted between our native San Diego and Orange County for years.) She went to all my baseball games (and pretended to understand the game!), gave me all the hugs that I needed, held my hand or was with me all 7 times (Yes! seven times) I got stitches as a kid, scolded me when I had done wrong, taught me how to Christmas shop, taught me to respect others, taught me to hold the door open for a woman, and demonstrated care for others by various volunteer efforts. Was my mom perfect...? Pretty close to it! To be honest, outside of her smoking habit that I tried to talk her out of repeatedly from the time I was around 10 years old, there weren't many things she did that I thought was wrong. I'm sure there was, but a son's memory tends to be a little selective... :)

The greatest attribute that my mom possessed was the ability to respect other people and treat other people well. Yes, she gave me the proverbial speeches of "If you don't have anything good to say, don't say anything at all." or to "Treat others as I would have them treat me". But with her it was more than a speech. I felt like she lived that way. And she always made me personally feel like I was the most important person around.

My mom LOVED Agatha Christie books and loved to read in general. I used to go to the old library on Sandrock road on Serra Mesa and wait and wait and wait and wait until she was done picking out books to bring home (anyone remember that branch?! I know they have opened a new branch on Aero Rd.)

Another time my brother and I would have to wait for my mom was when we would go shopping down in Fashion or Mission Valley. In those days Woolworth's department store had a cafe and my mom would stop and get some lunch or even just a piece of pie for my brother and I. But one thing my mom would not give up was the laaaast drop of her coffee! My brother and I would be so fidgety and ready to go but my mom would NOT leave until she had drained the very last of her coffee cup!

My mom was also a great cook. I remember her cooking all types of dishes. She would cook German dishes periodically due to our German heritage. Or a Roast. Fried Chicken and mashed potatoes. Cow's tongue (yes...you heard right. And it was good!). But my favorite food that my mom made? Her Corn Fritters with maples syrup! Mmmmmm When it was my birthday and she would ask what I wanted to eat? Corn Fritters! My mom also taught me to bake cookies and cakes (we had a lot of fun together). The only cook I ever remember being better than my mom? That would be her mom, my Grandma! (More on her later).

My biggest disappointment that my mom is not still alive is that she never got to meet Brenda, my wife of 21 years who my mom would adore! And she never got to meet my son and become the tremendous grandmother I know she would have been! Fortunately for my son, my mother-in-law is a wonderful grandmother to him. In fact, she is a tremendous mom to me too and I realize how lucky I am in that regard...

Anyway, I am going to post more on my mom this weekend. And more on my Grandmother. But right now, I am going to post some pictures of her...More later!

1851 Navy Cap and ball revolver (.44 Cal from Pieta through Cabela's)

Some pics of my uncle

I found these pics while looking through some old boxes of pictures. My uncle was always good to me. I was with him near the end when cancer took it's toll...

Yeah, that's right. Today is my Birthday

Not a big deal any more. Once I passed 35, I stopped caring quite a bit. (That was X years ago...Sigh) I took the day off from work so I could relax and take a big dive and a long swim in "lake me"...do some things I have been meaning to do that are low priority and have not been able to do since work is BUSY and weekend time has been trying to get things done that need to be done before Phoenix turns into a thermal pinal colony like the one portrayed in "The Chronicles of Riddick"... :) My day started off right though with a nice breakfast, gifts from my family, and a Birthday Post on my Facebook wall and a rendition of Happy Birthday sung to me by a dear and wonderful friend from ABQ. So, I am off to a great start! Talk soon!

Daniel's first Football game!

My son Daniel has never played football and before and joined the flag football team with his Jr. High. This was his first game ever and he was playing defensive line and in this play he puts a spin move (practiced in our lliving room last weekend?!) and almost gets a sack! This and one other are on our YouTube site. (Link on this page) He had so much fun! I think he is really hooked on football now.

Enjoying the newly installed grass led to...

...a water fight with my son! Too much fun! He is such a great guy. I can still out wrestle him, but for how long?!?! :)